No matter how long we spend apart we instantly just click back together again. Talking deep conversations about futures and settling down and careers and answrring questions that nobody else seems to answer for us.
Although all this time abroad does seem to disillusion her. Some random guys started talking to her while I went to the loo. Then as I came back they got rowdy and started being rude towards the bouncer. We left to go get a taxi but as we left I heard the guys making comments about me and my weight, and then she turns and says ‘I do miss how friendly the people are at home’. I wonder if she hears what they’re saying….as if I tell her that they’re not being nice, they’re just trying to show off and get you in bed, she argues the case saying I can’t assume all guys are like that.
Maybe its that she doesn’t hear or see the lack of self esteem in my voice or the comments that are made. They infuriate me.
I’d say I can’t wait for a lie in tomorrow but I’m taking Jon to work. However, that does give me an excuse to go and treat myself to some retail therapy and go and pick up my beautiful new diary and organiser! And I might treat myself to some new make up brushes and make ups! Need to try some of the Body Shop Instablur primer!
Not so sure I’m going to enjoy this new job. I’m hoping it gets busier, because if there’s one thing I don’t enjoy its sitting around getting paid to watch clocks.
Also I just watched the saddest thing on tv. Mum’s having surgery tomorrow. My cousin’s partner is currently being cut out of his car in a very serious state. And we went to go and pick up my car, after being told it was fixed, to find out it wasn’t fixed and he thought we were somebody else. My uncle is on his death bed. And I’m still not over Robin Williams. This week is poop.
All I can think of today is how different today’s news might have been if Robin Williams could see the love shown for him by people of all ages all over the world.
I choke up every time I think that somebody has gotten to a point of being so depressed and unhelped that they feel the need to torture their body and end their lives. I respect them and their decisions but I can’t help but think, surely just one little bit of help could have made a difference.
This weekend shall be a weekend of BLITZING the house…..
We’ve been doing only the essential cleaning for weeks now because we’ve just been working so hard that we’ve not had the energy. So seeing as I’m starting my new job on Monday it is time to start afresh with the house too.
I’ve spent 3 hours deep cleaning the kitchen. Now its on to the living room. And hopefully I’ll have time for the spare bedroom before Lewis arrives for a well needed chill out movie night with beers and pizza.
Then I’ve got more work to do tomorrow for a client while trying to get our bedroom fully cleaned (luckily we’ve kept pretty much on top of our room for the past few weeks) and finishing off with the dreaded office clean out. Cleaning an office that is so regularly used is bloody hard work!
So here I am selling loads of clothes on ebay and doing okay from it.
We need a load of new furniture but I don’t want tacky Ikea furniture anymore, it doesn’t last and is such poor quality, as is the majority of furniture sold from places like Argos and the likes…but the decent quality stuff is so expensive! I look on Ikea and there’s so much furniture that is amazing quality and SUPER cheap and you just need to go and pick it up.
As poor as I am I’m so tempted to just make a couple of purchases. We need new wardrobes, new coffee table, chest of drawers, bathroom storage….you name it we need it!!!
A day of putting stuff up on ebay, sending invoices and getting ready for date night.
So little money this month all because of bank screw ups and idiot energy suppliers messing up our bills. And I’m not getting paid due to the new job. And its car insurance month. Boo hiss.
Everything is fine though because my boyfriend recently is being one hell of a sweetheart. Off to see Guardians of the Galaxy and then for Rosies Diner afterwards! And last week we did Bowling and Rosies Diner. All on him for a change. I think he’s realised just how much I do for him.
Today I am noticing a significant change in my attitude recently.
Generally feeling slightly more confident and like I’m taking a bit better care of myself. Simple things like doing my make up everyday instead of just going to work with no make up on, and actually taking time and investing in my make up.
Today I also spent the day in a very intense day of training to become a Dementia Friends Champion. As intense and hard work as the training was I loved it and cannot wait to go out and spread the word and I’m actually really proud. I might not take part in all these 5k and 10k runs or jump out of planes at any given opportunity to help charities but I do like to know that I’m doing something for the causes that I feel for.
I also am now getting excited to start my new job. The fact that it is so many different jobs all rolled into one and created just for me makes me one incredibly proud girl, and I feel good to know that all of my hard work has paid off to come to this point. I left school at 16 having to prove a point to my parents, that if I were to leave school I had to make my own way through life earning a living. That’s when I started full time work. I then went on to spend the best 2 years of my life at art college doing what I love. From then on I experienced uni and left after a couple of years because the course didn’t have as much academia as I liked. I worked in an area I was interested in, then I tried something new and then by stroke of luck ended up where I am now again in an area that interests me. I started self employed work and became partners with a colleague and we were receiving excellent feedback. We might have been tired and working until 2am most mornings but it was worth it. Our work dried up though and my gut told me that something wasnt right T my current job and so I started looking elsewhere. I got a few interview invites then told that my job was approved. The day after I was approached by a colleague who’s partner owns a civil engineering business who wanted a chat with me as he’d heard good things. We met and instantly clicked and talked over some exciting ideas…and within a week a job offer was on the table. The job offer I declined initially. Within 2 hours a new offer was put forward and before I could answer I had an email with a further offer in my inbox. I decided that was it, with my gut feelings that something still wasn’t right in my current workplace I jumped. I handed my notice in and accepted the job. 2 weeks after accepting the job I found out my role at my current workplace hadn’t been approved and I’d just been told that it had….so my gut was right. I’m now incredibly glad I took the job and I am so excited to be getting back to doing something where I can learn and be interested and have responsibilities all while doing admin.
Sat watching super old school Geordie Shore because I can’t sleep.
I’m in a state where I am well aware that I start this new job 2 weeks tomorrow and I do not feel in the slightest bit prepared for it. It’s the first job I’ve had where I’ve had to dress with a sense of formality withlut there being a supplied uniform. If you don’t know what that means….it means I don’t own any formal clothes. Some serious shopping is needing to be done.
I’m about 93% sure I’m going to accept a new job offer.
This time next month I could be starting training to be a civil engineering technician, managing an admin team and project managing. Still need to find that 7% that’s left to make the decision. That 7%is only going to come from courage though.
I do hate being a grown up sometimes. It involves doing horrible things like emptying 2 week old rubbish from the wheely bin to take it to the tip because the stupid binmen went on strike and wont collect it for another fortnight. Do they really think the world wants to live in a stinking big pile of crap.
I’ve been sat in my silent living room for almost two hours now just thinking.
Do I regret the choices I’ve made? Do I stay at my current job? Do I accept this job offer? Do I find another job? Do I find a job with training opportunities? Do I go back to uni? I just dont know what to do!!!
This week is turning out to be a slightly confusing week with rather a lot going on.
I found out my vacancy has been approved to become permanent but will need to be advertised. I got headhunted for another job. I became partners with a colleague in my freelance business which has picked up next to no end. I got my place confirmed on my Dementia Champion training next month and this morning I made a cake.
So excited to go to Dementia Champion training though. I really am.